Funny Cadence

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For those of us who spent time in uniform, cadence calls (Jodie calls if you were an army grunt) helped passed the time and the miles. Here are some good ones:

If I die in a combat zone
box me up and ship me home
pin my medals upon my chest
tell my momma I did my best
in my coffin I will lie
grounded to inspection side
sound off,1,2
sound off,3,4
bring it on down
1,2,3,4
1,2 … pause … 3,4!

—

I saw an old lady walkin’ down the street.
She had a chute on her back, and jump boots on her feet.
I said, “Hey, Old Lady, where you goin’ to?”
She said, “I’m goin’ to the Army Airborne School.”
I said, “Hey, Old Lady, I think you’re too old;
You’d better leave that stuff to the brave and the bold.”
She said, “Listen, Sonny, I’m talking to you;
I’m an instructor at the Airborne School.”

I saw the same old lady walkin’ down the street.
She had a pack on her back, jungle boots on her feet.
I said, “Hey, Old Lady, where you goin’ to?”
She said, “I’m goin’ to Marine Corps Recon School.”
I said, “Hey, Old Lady, I think you’re too old;
You’d better leave that stuff to the brave and the bold.”
She said, “Listen, Sonny, I’m talking to you;
I’m an instructor at the Recon School.”

I saw the old lady walkin’ down the street.
She had a tank on her back, and fins on her feet.
I said, “Hey, Old Lady, where you goin’ to?”
She said, “I’m goin to the Navy Diving School.”
I said, “Hey, Old Lady, I think you’re too old;
You’d better leave that stuff to the brave and the bold.”
She said, “Listen, Sonny, I’m talking to you;
I’m an instructor at the Diving School.”

I turned to leave, and she spun me around;
She kicked me in the head, and threw me to the ground.
I looked up through my tears, and with a voice full of fear,
I begged, “Please, Old Lady, don’t kill me right here.”
She said, “Listen, Sonny, don’t you mess with me;
I’m Airborne, Recon, and UDT!”

—

I had an old dog and his name was blue
blue wanta be a combat diver two
so I bought him a mask and four tiny fins
took him to the ocean and I threw his ass in

well blue came up to my surprise
with a shark in his teeth and a gleem in his eye
now old blues a combat diver too
dont mess with him or he’ll bite you

cus he’s hardcore
all the way
hardcore
every day
its who we are
its what we do
para
rescue
combat
controll
motivated
dedicated
armor plated
hydrated
always wet
never dry
love to run
ain’t no lie
hooya
hooya
hooya!